A Christmas Wish

Whether you celebrate the holiday or not, the season is generally associated with what I'd refer to as Hallmark moments: images of fireplaces, decorated trees, happy family gatherings, what have you, with a holiday soundtrack of festive & joyful carols, etc.

Reality is very different for a lot of us this season. Why this is so is a different story for each person.

 and for those of you in this category (including yours truly), I share some of the lyrics of a Christmas song written the Civil War.

"I heard the bells on Christmas Day
Their old, familiar carols play,

and wild and sweet

The words repeat

Of peace on earth, good-will to men!"

Skipping past some lyrics referring to the war:

"And in despair I bowed my head;
"There is no peace on earth," I said;

"For hate is strong,

And mocks the song

Of peace on earth, good-will to men!"

Then pealed the bells more loud and deep:
"God is not dead, nor doth He sleep;

The Wrong shall fail,

The Right prevail,

With peace on earth, good-will to men."

A way you can help

There's a local area church that holds an annual memorial service for the area homeless who've passed away that year. The observance includes dinner, and this year's service was held last night. I neglected to account for that, and we had less than five people show up last night.

One of them turned out to be new to the streets and just happened to be passing by.  He'd been eating nothing but peanut butter all week and was grateful to get a hot meal. We ended up talking for probably two hours. This person I'll call Dave is trying to get into PCC (Pasadena Community College) and hopeful that most of the credits he's already accumulated will transfer. He likes history but is focusing on the area of kinesiology leading to some sort of PT/OT career. Throughout our conversation he kept commenting on how wonderful it was just to have a normal conversation.

Some people show up just for the food. They show up, eat and leave, or they leave carrying their plates and eat elsewhere. But there are some who are grateful for the chance for some regular social interaction. I was happy to meet 'Dave' and learn a bit about him, but there is no way I can do that regularly with everyone who shows up; we need people who are willing to show up regularly and provide the opportunity for connection.

At present we show up and try to start serving dinner at 6:45pm Tuesday night (looking to expand to Thursday nights as well) and we're typically done by 8pm (though I personally have stayed as late as 10:30pm talking with people). If you've gotten this far, and you're local to the Pasadena area, I hope you'll consider helping out by donating some of your time.  If you're handy in the kitchen and are able to contribute in the food area even better. But just showing up, and being able to greet someone by their name can be meaningful.

What is Barry's Kitchen about 2.0

Barry's Kitchen prepares meals for the homeless. Ultimately, it's about helping people to overcome the obstacles that are holding them back.  But it takes time and a certain amount of patience - it's not unlike befriending stray animals, drawn by the offer of nourishment, but each one having differing levels of hope and trust.

What makes us different? We seek to nourish rather than feed - and not just physically. While we do accept donations of prepared food, we strive to provide simple but nutritious meals with more of a home cooked flair. We made this choice when we heard of how one homeless person gained 100 lbs in about a year because he got all the free junk food he wanted. The homeless tend to be shunned and ostracized by the rest of society. While they eat, we encourage them to interact much like they would if they having a family meal to talk among themselves and volunteers. For want of a better way to describe it, we seek to nourish not just the body, but the mind and soul as well.

Conquering fear is a big part of the mission, but it starts with ourselves. I discovered that in 2013, when I was attacked in the park after serving dinner. My assailant (who has since been committed to the Patton State mental hospital in San Bernadino) came up from behind me with a box cutter and severed the anterior branch of my carotid. I was forced to decide how much I was willing to risk to pursue something worthwhile. I've never regretted the choice I've made and I've since been prompted to deal with other fears I've carried around for years.  Starting Barry's Kitchen has forced me to deal with the fear of being vulnerable myself.  I've gotten as far as I can doing this with my own resources. I need your help.